Summertime and the livin' is easy

You guys. It's straight up summer. I don't know if you've been in the city over the last few days but is is mother 'effin HOT in hur. 

I also don't know if you've been looking at my Instagram lately (probably because...duh.) but my hair has been permanently up in a half messy bun channeling Khlo-Money consistently for two months for a few reasons. 1. If you know me, you know I have a straight hair concept. Meaning if it isn't poker straight, I can't deal. 2. It has taken its good ole' time getting to blonde and that's left my ends just a little bit rougher than usual. But don't worry, I've got my appointment with one Kelly hair extraordinare next week to cut those puppies off. 

Trust me, we are getting somewhere here. 

I used to thrive in the summer. Endless days and nights in the sun, hair down every day—especially at the pool and beach, oily skin bronzed perfection. And then...BAM! (Think My Cousin Vinny Marisa Tomei and the deer...) AGE.

Standing in the sun for four hours at the CAVS parade (well worth it) brought out at least two dark spots on my face that I knew were there but had spent months covering up with makeup and applying skin lightener religiously to. It's not OK. 

Blogger note: Yes I am aware these are from the endless days and nights of my youth. But I can't exactly change it now, can I?

My skin was so incredibly dry and burnt and splotchy after the parade, it was atrocious. So, I thought I'd take this enlightening experience (and impending South Carolina vacation) to share with you all some of my older age beauty favorites for summer.

1. Hat. Yes. This officially makes me an old lady. But honestly, I totally take back everything I've ever said about the women covered in hats and shade at the beach because you know what? They are going to be bang-in' and I am going to be a sickly spotted leopard. Not a cute one either. I've learned that shading your face is the best way to avoid discoloration and prevent age spots and wrinkles.

2. Sunscreen. This is a duh, right? Clearly it isn't because I consistently have to remind my friends to wear it every single day! I put 50 SPF on my face every day before makeup and my concealer also includes 50 SPF. In the summer, I also use Lubriderm SPF lotion. It's amazing. A God send. SPF 50 all over my body, no sunscreen feeling or smell. Because trust me ladies, those wrinkles and spots don't just show up on your face (Cue: Angelina Jolie's hands.) On that note, don't forget an SPF in your gloss or chapstick. I didn't pay for these lip injections just to have nasty, sun damaged lips my friends. Protect your investments.

3. Bumble and Bumble Hairdresser's Invisible Oil. I love this stuff. It's like crack. (I imagine...) Not only do I put this in my hair prior to drying (I try to avoid drying in the summer all together) but I bring it to the pool or beach with me and put it in my locks before going in, and when I jump out to avoid tangles and drying out from the chlorine and sun. Be sure to pack a wide tooth comb and brush that shit out when you get out of the water. Remember: tangles are for amateurs and Disney Princesses.

4. Self-Tanner. I'd love to tell you all I found the perfect self-tanner, but I haven't. I've been using San Tropez In Shower, and it's okaaayyy. But the point is, get a spray tan before vacation or throughout the summer as needed. Somehow maintain a faux tan so that you never have to get a real one. Because the real one, es no bueno. 

5. Lip Tint. I lurrrvee product. So I'm not one to say, "it's summer, take it easy on the makeup" but I really dislike sticky gloss or a heavy lip in the summer. Maybe it messes with the taste of my margaritas? Regardless, I did my own review of lip tints inspired by Cupcakes and Cashmere and have found that Stila Cherry Crush is my fave. It gives great color! I will say however, that I don't think any stain can withstand a night out. I always end up reapplying. 

6. Coconut Oil. Perfect for the times when you literally just could not put enough sunscreen on (ahem CAVS parade.) Also perfect for a hair mask every week to keep your locks moisturized in the dry summer heat. Really, there is nothing that Coconut Oil can't do. If you're not drinking the Koolaid, you should be. It's everything.

7. Bug Spray. I seriously get eaten alive 24/7. I like to think it's because I have olive oil running through my veins but really, I think it's because I can't live without perfume. That said, bug spray can be full of chemicals and ya'll know I don't get down with that. I love Badger Bug Repellent with SPF 34. It's a pretty strong lemon scent, though. Not into that? I've heard good things about Malin + Goetz as well, no residue or overwhelming smell.

Help a sister out! What are a few summer products you can't live without?

I Bought a House...and other news

I have yet again been neglecting my blog and you know what? I am not even going to make excuses for it. Life is crazy, the end.

So what have I been doing the past few months? (Obviously not blogging about The Met and Billboard awards.)

I bought a house. A little blue humble abode in the heart of Cleveland Heights.

Thanks for the photo Trulia.

Thanks for the photo Trulia.

I went to Nashville.

And Chicago.

To celebrate two wonderful brides, one of which is getting married this weekend, ending their single life and promising to love and cherish their teammate till death do they part. (See I do have SOME feelings. I promise.)

I worked on the house. I painted, sanded, purchased, landscaped, purchased some more and drank...a lot.

I celebrated a best friend's birthday.

I worked on the house.

I kicked off summer with a few Indians games.

I worked on the house.

It's been an eventful and trying few months and I am more than ready to enjoy the sunshine and summertime with friends, family and my animals. But...

 

 

You didn't think I'd leave you without a few quick fashion notes, did you?

Met Gala. "Manus x Machina: Fashion in an Age of Technology" was the theme for the 2016 event.

The Met Gala is where every celebrity goes to see just how ratchet they can make themselves look. The Met Gala with a technology theme, is where every celebrity goes to see how ratchet they can look in metallics. So you can imagine it would be difficult for me to select a worst. There were so many tragedies (Kimye, I'm lookin' at you! DVF, Kerry...I physically can-not.) The worst of the worst however, is Madonna.

I've been told that not liking Madonna is a cardinal sin since about 2004. But, I refuse to change my mind. I can't get down with her. At all. And this is a prime example of why.

While it was difficult to find, swimming through a see of metal, feathers and hair. So. much. hair. Two lovely ladies managed to stand out, slaying the rest.

Kendall Jenner. I would probably give her this even if I didn't love the concept of futuristic macramé simply because her body is in-sane. But really, this Versace on her is stun-ning and while on-theme and interesting enough, isn't disgusting (and that's apparently a big ask people!)

(As if you guys didn't know this, but Kate Hudson was a very close second.)

Next up, the 2016 Billboard Music Awards.

Again, similar to the Grammy's and Met, Billboard is an excuse to dress in-sane. And apparently, everyone got the memo. The men looked like they just rolled out of bed and/or have been living homeless for at least a few days (Pete, Ashton...) The women, well there were a lot of misses here. I won't even acknowledge ZLaLa because we all know that was ridiculous. How did she even sit down? Did they give her an entire row? Just stop it.

Because there are so many terrible ensembles, I am going to go with a worst dressed that I simply expected better from. Someone that should know better than to wear something this terrible, someone that never ends up on my worst dressed list. Demi Lovato.

I don't know if she was cold, hot, feeling skinny, feeling gross, trying to be edgy in a sort-of pantsuit with a not-at-all edgy mock Chanel jacket or what but this outfit could have been totally on point. Transform this mess by removing the gloves and jacket. She is flawless. Less is more and this outfit of layers ended up being too much.

(Blogger Note: Yes, I think Rihanna, Meghan Trainor and Tove Lo were freaking terrible too.)

Started from the bottom now we here...

The bad moms collectively, had me girl crushing hard. I found myself wondering if they needed a fourth, even considering adoption just so I could hang with these stone cold foxes. Ah-mazing.

My best of the night, Zendaya. This dress is the perfect color on her skin, it fits her slim body in all the right ways and makes a statement without being overstated. I love it.

Next up, wedding season! Stay tuned as I review the bride's wedding choices from gowns to decor...

 

Kidding. I think. ;)

 

TGIL- Thank God It's LEO!

Now that I’ve come out of my state of depression, accepting the fact that despite their adoring eyes, Leo and Kate will never be together, let’s talk fashion.

The 2016 Oscars took place on Sunday night and along with a few staples, a new group of golden girls and boys were up for the gold and dressed to impress.

But what fun would it be to only talk about that? Time for The Oscars Burn Book ladies and gents!

The Worst

Alicia Vikander in her staple Louis Vuitton.

I know I will be accosted for this but I have to say, I think it’s overwhelming on her tiny gorgeous body. I love the effortless hair, gorgeous chandelier earrings and barely there stilettos. BUT. This is a great example of how easy formal ball gown can go prom. It’s a slippery slope my friends.

Speaking of slippery slope, Sophia Vergara.

Her body is fire. She could literally wear a bag and look FYNE. The immediate impulse to go gown for The Oscars is common, as it is the most formal of the awards however, this Marchesa gown is so incredibly prom-like and there is just too much going on. Her hair back however, is kill-er. I love that she switched it up and hope she does this more often with that gorgeous weave.

Cate Blanchett.

I know. Everyone in the world loved this Armani Prive ensemb. I so wish I could! She is usually such a hit for me. While I love the color and texture it was overall, in my opinion, too much. This dress would have been perfection leaving the top as-is, and beyond the waist in the same color, simple silk penciled to the ground. Just call me Ms. Armani.

Olivia Wilde.

Wearing Valentino haute couture, this was a tricky pick for me. I can’t decide if I would love the gown if it weren’t for the styling choices or… if I just hate it. The choker is so big and the hair so done, next to an already exaggerated shoulder and structure of the pleats, was a miss for me. Writing this now, I firmly believe with no necklace, simple earrings and a loose down hair (ala Kate Winslet)—she might have made my best dressed.

Also, like, do we all really have to wear chokers again?

Heidi Klum.

Klum is known for wearing the tight, body hugging Calvin Klein looks and has completely gone a different direction in this ridiculous, overwhelming purple Marchesa dress. I can’t. It’s a disgrace to all of us Project Runway lovin’ fools. A disgrace wrapped in terrifying purple fabric and huge stuck on flowers.

More burns: Andra Day (big bird), Amy Poehler (bird feeder), Jennifer Jason Leigh (killed the bird for its feathers).

 

Now, to the Queens of the night...

Rooney Mara.

Hi my name is Rooney Mara and I am an angel sent from above. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? This Givenchy is once again, as always, Rooney perfection. The hair, the lip and the in-sanity of the intricate details of this gown are making me feel so many feels.

Naomi Watts.

I actually can’t recall a red carpet where I didn’t obsess over Miss. Watts. Remember that terrible Kacey Musgraves tragedy from The Grammys? Yeah. Me too. Take notes bitch, this is how ya do it! Armani Prive and Bulgari killin’ the game.

Priyanka Chopra.

This was a very close best-dressed contender. First of all, she is pure perfection. I mean, please look at this Instagram. I die. Secondly, the Zuhair Murad dress, while a common silhouette for the red carpet with a sweetheart neckline and fishtail hem, is styled to perfection and is just total fire with the addition of that metallic belt against the feminine sheer white.

Rachel McAdams.

This August Getty Atelier dress is an emerald second-skin on this gorgeous girl. There are no Spanx under that! Yes. Bow down. AND, the side-boob is everything. Ev-er-y-th-an-g.

Jennifer Lawrence.

While she looked to-die on the red carpet in Dior Haute Couture, I had to highlight her after party look that I was entirely way too obsessed with. I love the full ensemb, the simple choker and one large statement ring, with that gorgeous white-blonde bob? Swoon. This Alexander Wang crop top and skirt combo is every-thing.

So who took home the honor of my Best Dressed you might ask?

Daisy Ridley in Chanel.

The ankle length style can be so tricky. I say that as someone who is five foot and nowhere near the 90lbs Daisy clearly is. But, really, it can be a difficult look on a woman and this dress is perfection on her. The slightest bit of peplum, the hem, the color, the hair, the accessories and those perfect shoes—she slayed ya'll.

Other swoon-worthy ladies: Olivia Wilde, Chrissy Teigan, Gaga, Emily Blunt, Margot Robbie and Charlize (hair not included).

 

What a fabulous night for fashion it was, and let's be honest, every awards show is now better with Jacob Tremblay around.

Congrats to my first love, Leonardo. Salut!

GRAMMYs Fashion

I know you all have been waiting on the edge of your seats for my Grammys fashion recap. My response to that?

Hold up ya needy bitches, I have a real job!

I kid.

But really, the Grammys are my favorite of all the red carpet recaps I write because honestly, the good is usually so good and the bad is epic.

This year, I was a little disappointed in the lack of cuckoo clocks. Whatever happened to showing up in an egg?

 

The Best

Bella Hadid.

Listen, I know everybody is all “Pillowtalk” about Gigi but you all know I prefer a little darkness. Bella is everything to me at the moment. Her piercing eyes in this all black ensemb with the slicked hair remind me of one of my other favorites, Rooney Mara. This Alexandre Vauthier Paris gown fits her like a glove, as it should, she is a model after all.

Ellie Goulding in Stella McCartney.

I love juxtaposition—in life and in fashion. Ellie’s typical rock persona in this gorgeous pastel pink gown is making me feel some type of way. The little visibility of her ink on her ribs and the messy hair? I die.

Ariana Grande in Romona Keveza.

Red is her color. She looks to-die in this gown and while it definitely matures her a bit, the signature high pony keeps it young. I could have done without the clutch holding on the red carpet, but ya know—the clutch was a big deal at prom so I totally get it.

Selena Gomez in Calvin Klein.

The bigger the hoop the bigger the…you know. I love her in this Calvin Klein stunner. She’s got the body to wear his designs just like Miss. Klum, but I absolutely could have done without the hoops. The dress is a gorgeous metallic fabric that could easily read cheap, and the hoops only help it get there.

Kaley Cuoco in Naeem Khan.

THIS is when you wear a gorgeous jumpsuit. THIS is the appropriate award venue. I love that she did a loose wave with the cut out and overall structured look of this white ensemble.

 

I know you’re probably asking—what about Mrs. Legend? Adele? Tay Tay?

To recap: I loved Chrissy’s gown, but it was a bit too Kim Kardashian for someone who is such a style icon in her own right. Adele, loved the hair but other than that, the dress was expected. And well, I’m just tired of talking about Taylor.

 

The Worst. There were some obviously real offenders here.

Dencia. What the actual fuck? You have terrible friends and “people” if anyone let you walk out of the door in a pink sweat suit with Hello Kitties glued all over it to walk a red carpet. Terrible.

Jacqueline Van Bierk. OK so you’re a bat? I’m confused.

Joy Villa. Nope. Never.

Ciara in Alexandre Vauthier.

We get it. Your body is a party, or whatever that song is called. I’m not trying to throw shade at your clearly tight and toned bod, but we don’t need to see all of it. I am a big fan of the “pick-a-place rule”. Show leg, or cleavage—never both. Show back or cleavage—never both. You get it.

Kacey Musgraves in Armani.

I hate everything about this chameleon lizard-like gown. And also, I am secretly convinced that she’s a big slut soooo.

Meghan Trainor.

This could have been such a moment for Meghan. Her new hair color is kil-ler. The curl she’s rocking overwhelms her round-shaped face. She should have gone very light waves or poker straight on a night like the Grammys. And, if you’re going to do the shoulder pads, you can’t do the big hair. Straight and uneventful or pulled back only. I actually don’t hate the dress, I just think it’s ill-fitting and the ensemb together is disheveled.

Justin Bieber…is a dirty child molester?

Really, the weirdos dressed like weirdos, Justin showed us he can barely grow a mustache and hangs out at playgrounds and my girl Bella and The Weekend took best, most fierce couple of. all. time.

Until next time folks!

 

Image Credit: Getty Images

 

 

2016 Golden Globes Best & Worst Dressed

It's arrived! Award season is upon us and I couldn't be happier. Last night was the 2016 Golden Globes — the 73rd in the show's history and the fashion was, as always, fierce.

Here are my picks for the 2016 Best and Worst Dressed at the Golden Globes.

Best Dressed:

JLO in Giambattista Valli. 

JLO in Giambattista Valli. 

Bow down to the queen. I love to see JLO in a form-fitting, sleek and sexy number, so I really enjoyed this change of pace for her. Even conservative looks good on that bod! She's flawless, her skin glowing and the lip is the perfect shade of oxblood to complement the yellow stunner. 

Cate Blanchett in Givenchy. 

Cate Blanchett in Givenchy. 

OK. I'm aware I might be crucified for this pick, but I adore 20's fashion. If anyone can pull this look off, it's Cate. The color is perfect for the fringe, not too bright or dark making the look tacky. Plus, her modern hair and simple accessories compliment the vintage frock perfectly. I'm in love, and I don't care who knows it!

Kate Hudson in Michael Kors.

Kate Hudson in Michael Kors.

My spirit animal. Her body? In-sane. As-if I wouldn't include her in the Best Dressed. She could wear a bag and she'd still be my Queen. But really, I do love this 90's inspired frock from Michael Kors. Perfect for her free-spirited personality and gorgeous blonde locks.

Olivia Wilde in Michael Kors.

Olivia Wilde in Michael Kors.

Again in Michael Kors, this time in my favorite color of the season: oxblood. Not only is her body clearly banging and perfect for this plunging neckline and second-skin fit, her dress is perfectly complimented with a Bulgari Hertiage Collection choker. 

Malin Ackerman in Reem Acra.

Malin Ackerman in Reem Acra.

Girl you better werk! There were so many sparkles on the carpet yesterday, but this is how you do them! Her Reem Acra peplum silver gown was perfectly complimented with slicked back hair, off the shoulders and extremely simple accessories. The only thing I would have changed? Take that train off the dress so it doesn't feel as bridal. Regardless, she's killer. It looks amazing!

So, who is my best dressed of the night you might ask?

Alicia Vikander in Louis Vuitton.

Alicia Vikander in Louis Vuitton.

I know some of you may be underwhelmed, but I love that she did it different than the crowd. The white mousseline Louis Vuitton dress was a change of pace for the night and stood out beautifully. She did winter white to perfection when so many others fell short. Love, love, love!

The Worst Dressed:

Gina Rodriguez.

Gina Rodriguez.

She is gracing lots of Best Dressed lists this morning, but they sure ain't mine! I love Zac Posen but this gown completely takes over her body. The satin and the hair—it was all just a little too vintage prom for me.

Zendaya.

Zendaya.

Number one, I don't understand why this girl can go by one name. As if she is in the ranks with Madonna and Cher. Like, no. Who do you think you are? What's your last name? Use it! Number two, she is literally 90 pounds. A slight breeze would knock her over. And listen, I know it's not easy getting that skinny. Don't act like you are eating cheeseburgers and fries girl, we know you're chewing gum and drinking tea with creamer. That said, why would you add the bulk of this Marchesa dress to your tiny little figure? Not only that, but a dress that looks like a comforter! No. No. No.

Jada Pinkett-Smith.

Jada Pinkett-Smith.

You are married to one of the hottest men in this universe and this is what you choose to wear on a carpet next to Rosie Huntington? No. It ages you, it looks dated and the matching green satin shoes are just awful. 

Rooney Mara.

Rooney Mara.

Let God strike me down for putting an Alexander McQueen on my Worst Dressed List. I just cannot get down with this. I love her hair, I love the color of the gown, I love her makeup and generally I love her but I do not love the dish rag she is wearing. (I'm so so so so sorry McQueen!)

Emilia Clarke. 

Emilia Clarke. 

For a minute, I thought I'd turned my channel to Hocus Pocus. I love vintage and I sure as hell love Haute Couture, but this completely took over her body. The length, the cape and the high neck are all too much for her petite figure. Show the skin we see on Game of Thrones, girl! You're hot!

Regina King.

Regina King.

Yesterday was the day of capes, and other items flowing off of the backs of our favorite celebrities. Unless you are Lady Gaga in American Horror Story in her red ah-mazing cape, which you aren't, I can't. I'd like to say without the cape I would like this dress, but I wouldn't.

Amanda Peet.

Amanda Peet.

Amanda Peet used the remainder of Rooney Mara's dish rag. The end. 

 

That's a wrap folks. The 2016 Golden Globes have ended, Sylvester Stallone and Leo won Oscars and all is right in the world. 

Until next time...