I wasn't aware.
Ryan Lochte is reason number one why I will be watching the 2012 Olympics but, I promise he won't be the only reason. Kind of.
If you have been watching the Olympics this year that you know, half the fun is watching the hot men and women, compete. The other half? The uniforms! Well, in my opinion.
I recently had a life changing experience when I walked in to my first ever Ralph Lauren store. Can they even call it a store? It's basically a house! Dark wood floors, fire burning, painted portraits of Sir. Collar the 3rd. Get it? I spent the entire time, while waiting for a friend to pick up an overpriced cotton polo, speaking in an English accent and fake drinking tea with my pink up. Mature, I know.
It was insane. So, I find it a bit weird that this brand outfits the U.S. Olympic teams. Yes, it's a U.S. brand but, up until this year the uniforms were produced in China! So, tell me what kahkis, belts with animals, Sperrys and a horse have to do with the Olympics? OK. I'll give you the horse.
In my opinion, I'd love to give this assignment to American Apparel. What could be more perfect? Let's change it up in the next four years!
When I'm not critiquing Lochte's tight speedo or Jennifer Kessy's bathing suit and what I swear is cellulite, I swear I saw a little right there! Or, maybe there! Whatever, I know I saw it--I'm practicing my 8-year-old skills by asking a million questions.
I mean really, how can you not have a million questions?
What happens to the other athletes coaches when they get an entire new one for the Olympics? Why do all gymnasts crack under pressure & cry on camera? Why can't volleyball players wear actual shorts, not underwear? How do you know you are good enough to be an Olympic athlete? I mean, I thought I was a pretty good swimmer back in the day. Do you have to go through a referee selection like a jury selection? I mean, what if you really like China? That's not fair.
The questions are endless. They actually get continuously worse and more prevalent as the wine dwindles but, regardless the Olympics provide me with pure hours of entertainment, and I am sure many hours of annoyance for those I am watching with, throughout the month of August.
Let's go Lochte!
Thank me later.