So much has been going on.
1. I quit my job. I'm officially funemployed. Kind of, since I am working with the CLE Baby crew. (Only the best Doulas in Cleveland)
2. I had my bachelorette party. There was a penis. I think that's about all that needs to be said. I'm still having flashbacks that drive me to the corner of a room in a fetal position.
3. My wedding is in 100 days. Holy shit. How did that even happen?
I thought today I might talk a little bit about some things on my mind...I mean don't get excited, it's pop culture. My favorite topic and let's get real, if you're reading my blog you obviously love it too.
First, Stormy Daniels. Girl. I just do not know. I mean I do know. But I don't. Ya know? I just need you to lay off the plastic surgery for awhile. Only because it's making you look older. And this is your chance to THRIVE. I'm excited to see how you take advantage of it. Live your best life girl. Start now.
Kylie had a baby. Holy shit. I was 100% like, "I'm not talking about it because Kylie didn't let us in on this. And it's just such a promo for that family." Fast-forward to me watching her video announcement crying into my mozzarella sticks. #TeamStormi. Holy shit. I just realized writing this that she named her baby Stormi and a porn star with that same name is literally all over the news for fucking our President. I don't know what I have to say about that.
RHOBH is close to an end. Honestly I'm bored. I for one am ready for the rachetness that is Potomac. At least shit goes down, you know? I don't watch these shows to see people crying about who is a better friend - I don't care. I don't need you to have friends. I need you to accuse someone of doing cocaine in a bathroom.
Yonce and Jay Z return to the stage together. And you best your ass I was online at 10 AM to buy my tickets. For someone who is unemployed, I sure know how to spend. I am so excited to see them again. On The Run 1 was seen in Chicago and honestly - it was difficult to watch. I was totally #TeamHeDidntCheat and went to that concert and left saying "Yes he did. Who the fuck is Becky?" Most of the time they were separate on stage and when they had to be together it was less than ideal touching. So, we've gotten through the infidelity on Beyonce (Which in my mind is punishable by death. Honestly you know there are some crazy beehive fans out there that have contemplated this shit and well, Beyonce didn't help matters knocking out car windows with bats and such...) and we are doing it all over again. I'm HERE FOR IT.
The royal wedding is approaching. You bet your sweet ass I took off work to watch Kate and William get married. And this time, we've got the royal badasses tying the knot. I will be there, two inches from my TV with tea and crumpets. Self-promo: Follow my live tweet.
But seriously, so many other things have been happening in the world. March For Our Lives was yesterday, we've had some serious and devastating losses to gun violence as of late. Our President has made some damning decisions and generally, the country still feels divided.
Let's try to remember we are all human and we only get this one life, so let's use it to spread positivity.